La desgracia y el amor

en veces seinto que me he vuelto un patan, pero bueno no lo se tal vez... Ni a quien culparlo, estados unidos? los interminables insultos en los recuerdos de mi niñez? la pesadilla que fue cortar con amber? tanto alcohol que he tomado? viejas? el culero de mi hermano? mi eterna soledad? la perdida de mi fé? las veces que he estado a punto de morir? etc... etc... la lista podria seguir y seguir, pero en verdad no es culpa de una o de otra cosa sino de todas.
ya no se como ser mas quien soy. si me he vuelto desagradable es porque no veo lo lindo en la vida. yo solo quiero a mi cachorra blondi.
estoy solo. asi naci y en verdad creo que asi morire. triste, pero cada dia que pasa me acerca a esa fortuna. no escucho jamaz a alguien decirme que me quiere, ni a mis padres ni mis amigos ni a nadie. ya me acostumbre y me sentiria como un puto si alguien me lo dijese.
estoy solo y yo solo quiero ver a mi cachorra blondi. ella no puede hablar pero si me desmuestra que me quiere. como la he extranado.
es extrano como alguien como yo, segun normal, quiere tanto a su perra. bueno tal vez no, ya que es todo lo que siento que me queda. aun asi siento que le faye como padre y ojala me perdone porque yo la quiero mas que a mi ser. lo se, lo se es una perra bla bla bla, pero si estuviesen en mi situacion lo comprenderian.
disfruten la compania de su familia, de sus novias y de sus seres queridos. los recordaran cuando esten solos en un pais extrano en lo oscuro de la noche muriendose de frio.
no se que mas decirles mas que hagan lo que puedan para ser felices, y si no pueden pues hagan el inento de soportar su vida. tal vez les regrese la gracia de Dios despues en su vida.

Stuttgart y su Wasen

Make money! Fuck Bitches!!
Make money! Fuck Bitches!!
Its der Lizardkonig
nigga!

En este episodio de las aventuras del Lizardkonig hablare de mi ida al Wasen en Stuttgart.
Veran, era el cumple de mi cunado y me invito al Wasen a celebrarlo con el y varios de sus amigos, y en verdad me dio mucho gusto andar con paisanos otra vez. No lo se, tanto extranjero me hace sentirme extrano y escuchar el sonido de voces mexicanas me comforto un poco. pero x, me desvio.
Como digo el pretexto para tomar esta semana era el cumple de mi cunado. Bueno no es mi cunado pero pretendo hacer k se case con mi prima para k lo sea. El tio me cae muy bien y se lo voy a instigar a mi prima, pero en fin de eso no se trata el post.
Ok, pues ya estando ahi me encontre con el y su amiga Lucia, que por cierto esta wapa la chica y se nota k es chica linda, pero ella no es para nada de mi usual cachondeo. Si hago eso con ella me sentiria un cerdo y un patan. Se ve demasiado linda para eso. joder de k hablo.....mujeres
Bueno despues llego una amiga alemana de el y fuimos a tomar mesa y empezar a beber. Como tome lentamente me puse pedo jajaja. Ahi la pasamos bien y Lucia y yo estuvimos hablando y nos divertimos. Luego nos cambiamos de carpa a la de a lado y encontramos a otros de sus amigos.
Vaya k desmadre para entrar. En la entrada solo dejaron pasar a mis amigos y a mi me dejo afuera el aleman culero, tons tuve k buscar manera de entrar por las otras puertas. Despues de suplicarle a como 3 cabrones me dejaron pasar y encontre a mis cuates. Conoci a un tio de Sn Luis que igual se nota q es buen pedo y seguimos tomando. Hasta mi amigo jonatan le entro a la peda tomandole ron directo de la botella jaja.
Ya eran como las 8:40 pm y tenia k tomar el tren de regreso a Freiburg tons me fui. Joder!!! otro puto desmadre. Tome el tren hacia Karlsruhe pero me quede dormido y no se como fui a parar a Frankfurt a las 2 am. Luego ahi busque tren de regreso a Karlsruhe o Mannheim y tome uno k decia Mannheim Haubtbahnoff pero termino llevandonos a otro sitio y tuve k tomar un bus al haubtbahnoff. Se suponia k habia tren de ida de ahi a Freiburg pero no wey no. Despues de estar esperando 2 horas en el frio de la madrugada se les ocurrio decir a los punetas del Deutsche Bahn que habian cancelado el tren y k ahora tenia k tomar un bus de nuevo al norte hacia Heidelberg. Ok, pues ya no quedaba de otra, regresaria a Heidelberg.....Llegando ahi tuve k esperar otro rato y sin darme cuenta ya eran las 5 am. Gracias a Dios que llego el tren hacia Basel, en ruta a Freiburg, me subi y me kede jeton, igual sin querer. No mames! Cuando desperte senti que me habia pasado de nuevo y que ahora llegaria a Basel. Yo andaba que no mames! vi el reloj en el tren y solo eran las 7 am. yo sabiendo que este tren llegaba a freiburg a las 7 pense que effectivamente me habia pasado. yo con cara de 'no mames, pinches culeros, como me dejan....' pero lo que paso esk el tren se atraso y si llegue a freiburg a las 7:10.
Estaba tan feliz de poder regresara mi WG k casi lloro. Sali de Stuttgart a las 9 pensando q regresaria a freiburg a las 3 am y termino llegando aqui a las 7 del dia siguiente. Y eso que no he contado de los putos alemanes y turcos ojetes del camino....
En fin, son experiencias que se tienen que vivir para crecer como hombre, como las primeras veces que te pones pedo, fumas maria o cojes. minimo puedo decir que voy creciendo poco a poco. aunque me falta un poco mas, falta unas peleas y mas viejas. triste sera el dia que me amarre una chica wapa y me convensa a casarme....
hasta entonces

make money! fuck bitches!!
make money! fuck bitches!!
its der Lizardkonig
nigga

let there be AMSTERDAM

Back again putos! jaja, slow and steady wins the race, literally. This will make the chic blow up in ecstasy once she cums and she'll want to come back for more dick later on. Slow and steady niggaz. Make money Fuck bitches its der Lizardkonig!

Anyway I digress, and I'm not even high......but yea Amsterdam is the shit. Without a doubt the coolest city I've been in. Niggaz be smoking the ganja on the street, tourist pamphlets tell you to see the city while booming and remind you to hide your hard drugs in your shoes so the pigs wont take them. Besides, the city itself is beautiful. Like a series of islands, cuz Amsterdam has a fuck load of canals, and the city is layered. I stayed close to a place called Leidseplein, cool place but next time I want to stay closer to the inner city.
My favorite Coffee shop was called Roookies, in Leidseplein, and jaja there was a smartshop right next door, so when we wanted boomers we'd just buy em there. One day though I wandered into the inner city and chilled at a coffee shop to smoke but it turned out that they were showing Transformers on Blue Ray. Holy shit!! I'd seen that movie but not like that, fucking awesome in Blue Ray. Anyway....

The first day I was there I went to a pub crawl in Leidseplein and holy shit, I cant remember any night when I intoxicated myself with so many different kinds of things. At times I felt I was really high, but then I felt drunk and all of a sudden I was really booming. If I was a little less tired the night would of been so much better.
The weed in Amsterdam is super potent but I was determinded to be high every minute of the day. So...I just smoked jaja. I even brought back some seeds, Adrians Mega Haze. I just hope I can plant them when I get back to Michigan. Please for the love of God and St. Long the Alcoholic that the medical marihuana law passes. If it does then the US will have the privilege of housing me. Otherwise I'll go make money and fuck bitches some other place on earth, Spain maybe??

Yea Amsterdam has the red light district. A beautiful array of hos in display, and some are really really hot. To me it makes no sense for them to be prostitutes cuz they're so hot and they could easily do something else. Its cuz the bitches are lazy and now they ruined their life. Ohh well, not my problem.
Holland has adapted very well in this aspect. They know that one will never eradicate drugs or prostitution, so they legalized soft drugs and whores. Now they make a fuck load of money of it. Its not like the Hollanders are totally in support of these things but they know there's money to be made from the tourists.

Sadly my time of hedonism and debauchery in Amsterdam had to come to an end. Just in time because any more time there and I would of exploded. I really don't think I could live there. It's just too much, but that is the best place to have offices for my church. The Church of Hedonism.
I am the Messiah in that church, and our commandments are to drink, smoke and fuck like crazy. Evey month we flip a coint to see IF we believe in a god. Heads and then we nominate a god for the month, tails.. well we're free :D

Fuck I can never keep my thoughts in one place but yea...I left Amsterdam and came back to Freiburg. Last night I went out with some Spanish friends and tonight I'll do the same.

Make money fuck bitches
Make money fuck bitches
its der lizardkonig
nigga

Llevo ya un mes y no escribo...putos gringos

So yea bros and hos, I've been in Germany for now a month and I've only fucked one chick! What the fuck!! Really, I disappoint myself. The bitches will come and then my dick will be so tired it wont want to keep going. Its only a matter of time, the bitches will come....

Anyway, I should recap the past month and my first impressions. I guess you faggots want to hear about my impressions of "wow," "amazing," etc....

Here's the deal, Germany is kinda like the US with the exception that it is much more aesthetically pleasing. Germans are like the pre-evolution of the gringo. They evolved differently but you can easily see the similarities in anglo-gemanic culture. See how gringos are reserved? Well, Germans are more. Americans are not very open, as we are, but the germans are even more reserved. I dont even know how to put it in words, one has to go out in the street and live it themselves. They close their doors in the WG and your roommate will tell you about the concert hes going to but wont invite you. The Germans are generally not very good conversation starters, get them going and yes its cool, but its kinda hard to pass the initial barrier. Bitches are hot, and during hot days are abundant on the Kaiser-Josef Straße. Easy to pick up to. See Hispanics are the best thing in the world (except those goddamned argentinians who dont know shit about Futbol. jaja jk i love argentinian girls), Spaniards and especially Mexicans are loved here (praise be to Allah and St. Long the Alcoholic for the German bitches affinity to Mexicans), so I have had easy target practice. At the club I went to the first night I was here, I picked up two chics and could have fucked one, just I didnt have a place and I didnt have a phone to get the hos number. Ohh well, there will be more. And they do appear at times + its easy, just say hi in a provocative tone, tell them you're Mexican/Spanish/Colombian/etc..., you're new and want to meet new people who you can practice German with --> get her number ---> work on the lay --> fuck her. Easy.
Remember that the bitch likes Hispanic dick.

But I digress!!! The problem is not the Germans, I mean there are way to many in Germany lol but the real problem, like everywhere else in the world, are the goddamned gringos!!
Think of the fuckin irony? I live in the U.S. and I dont hang out with so many gringos as I do in Germany. I come to Germany to meet gringos! What the fuck!!! It appears that the only internationals in Freiburg at the moment are the gringos. American girls, although easy, will adamantly pursue the gringo dick.

Let me describe the typical Freiburger gringo to you.
1) College student from small private university
2) Loaded
3) White
4) Still young, so will drink a fuck load of shots
5) Will drink back home even though hes in europe and now he can go to bars
6) Sit at home with other gringos listening to old guitar hero style rock
9) like the germans, always eat salad before a meal and all know how to make that fancy european dressing with Balsamico (white people......)

I have nothing against the gringo. As a matter of fact I really like the kids, but being a dude that has lived alone since being 16, I feel very old at times. I cant blame them, the U.S. is the U.S. Let me put it this way, they're not internationals since they're so many they might as well be turks. Internationals are Erasmus/Latin Americans and Canadians/Asians/Africans/Middle-easterners.

I'm a simple guy, able to accommodate and be ok without that much shit hanging from my walls. Get what I mean? Give me beer, weed, pussy, tequila, a bed, some food, a washroom, an internet connection and I'm cool.

Again I digress!!!!! Enough about the americans. There will be another post about them.
Back to how I got to Germany.
Here was the itinerary:
1) Fly from Mexico to Paris
2) Paris to Stuttgart
3) Spend days in Stuttgart then go by train to Freiburg

I did do things according to my plan but, naturally, had certain unexpected happenings. For one, I got lost when I got off the plane in Stuttgart (took the wrong train lol). I'll be honest, I was scared. I didn't know how safe or unsafe it is here and I was waiting on a stop alone with my 50 kgs of luggage next to a Turk who had a face of few friends. Anyway, I got to my hostel though. Met this one Colombian chic, who lived up to the reputation of Colombianas, hot. Gave me her number but never answered again. Roomed with an English dude, cool dude but he never added me in Facebook. Met a fellow Mexican who showed me around Stuttgart but the next day I went to Freiburg.

Shit, I should of really not forggoten the directions to the Hostel in Freiburg. When I asked in the Freiburg Haubtbahnoff, the dude directed me to the Jugend Herberge 5km away from my Hostel, and since I had no idea where the Black Forest Hostel was, I just went to this place. Got off the Strassenbahn, that was packed btw, walked to the Jugend Herberge, past the Futbol stadium, and this was right before a game too, so everyone saw this one dude carrying a huge pack on the heat of the day. I got to the herberge and they told me that I my reservation was not there but 1km away at another Hostel. I ended up walking 5km to the innen stadt. When I got there I was fucking exhausted.

To be continued...im tired and want to go to sleep


Bitches....